“So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart.
Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and
Demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life,
Beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and
Its purpose in the service of your people.
Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide.
Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend,
Even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all people and
Bow to none. When you arise in the morning, give thanks for the food and
For the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks,
The fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and nothing,
For abuse turns the wise ones to fools and robs the spirit of its vision.
When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts
Are filled with fear of death, so that when their time comes
They weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again
In a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.”
― Chief Tecumseh
A generation stands upon the edge of life, yet they fear death so deeply that they waste life fighting it. I don’t suggest death is something to be taken lightly… that it should be mocked… that it is cause to throw caution to the wind. Yet, for man (humans for those who get hung up on a word) it is inevitable. We are born to death. We cannot cheat the reaper. What matters is what lies between the beginning and the end, and for some, what waits on the other side.
Unfortunately, death isn’t the only thing our youth fear. They fear failure. They fear conflict of any kind, unless it is self-created. They fear the still quiet of the night. They fear words which might damage their emotions or question their ideals. They fear loss — loss of those around them; loss of self-esteem; loss of control of their world. They fear climate change and the death of the earth. They fear religion and they rebel against the one thing which might have given them solace in a world they can’t control. They fear anything which challenges them, and they even fear success. And they expend all their energy and effort — the very energy which life demands — to rage against their fear.
Why shouldn’t they? They’ve had fear instilled within their psyche from birth. Their parents put it there. On 9/11/01, fear entered their homes and their lives. It slipped in through the flickering images of the television. It announced itself in still pictures and bold headlines. It tunneled its way through the internet. It walked through their neighborhoods. It was carried into the house and their darkened bedrooms upon the weighted shoulders of men and women who saw the world change before their eyes. It did just what the people who delivered it hoped it would do.
Our reaction? “Let’s put Billy into a bubble. We will build a cocoon to place around him and we will shelter him from hate, danger, words, germs, images, truth, and emotion. When he races, we don’t want him to feel the pain of losing. When he speaks, we don’t want him to hear words that hurt his feelings. When he goes out in the world, we don’t want him to get sick, or bruised, or damaged. We will push religion out of the public square because it only makes him feel bad. We will wrap him up so tightly that he will never have to face the pain in this world.” And he didn’t.
Our youth don’t know how to deal with anything which creates a challenge or an obstacle because they have never learned. They never lost a race, because everyone wins. They fear germs because they never played in the dirt. They fear truth because it often hurts. They fear danger because their parents told them it’s all around. Our children were protected from emotional challenges, and now the only emotion they understand is rage. The only tools they recognize for dealing with it have become public tantrums and escape by suicide.
Now we watch as they burn and destroy our cities, businesses, churches, monuments, institutions, and yes, our society. Still, we can’t tell Billy, “No.”
We tell our police to stand back. Let them just get it out of their system. Let them vent. Let them kick their feet, swing their arms, and yell until it causes buildings to crumble, lives to be lost, and ashes to fall from the sky. It’s healthy to let them express their emotions. Even as the violent criminals they have become, we continue to excuse their behavior. In fact, we even blame the people we hired to deal with our inability to control them.
These are the people who will run the world after you are gone. Yes, you’ll be gone, so it won’t matter (except when they graffiti your headstone or crush it as they drive over your grave). But you spent all of your life protecting them, and now you are going to leave them to destroy the world you hoped they would save?
OF COURSE, this is a generalization. Of course it’s wrong to group all of our youth with Billy, but Billy is a significant and destructive portion of our society right now. Those youth who are not Billy, look at him with wide eyes and wonder, WHY? Or more likely, WTF?
Someone has to tell Billy, “No!” We have a responsibility, to both Billy and our society.
And Billy? Billy has to get his shit together. He has to learn that touching the hot burner hurts. He has to realize he’s not always right; he’s not always in control; and other’s have the same right to speak as he does. He finally has to understand there are boundaries; society depends upon boundaries – whether set by self or set by the common good of the people. He can’t keep raging against his fear. Billy has to wake up, come to his senses, and see the world for what it is – a place where things don’t always go his way; a place where we all have to live together; a place where he has to face his fear, rather than screaming at it. He has to look out upon the horizon, and watch the sun slip past the edge of the earth, hear the quiet closing of a day, and recognize the limits of his presence. He has to feel his days speed past, their finite numbers slipping beyond his grasp, and he needs to make the most of them. If he doesn’t, all he has feared will consume him more quickly than he ever imagined.
“Your days are numbered. Use them to throw open the windows of your soul to the sun. If you do not, the sun will soon set, and you with it.”
― Marcus Aurelius,
